Friday, October 18, 2013

True Nothingness [Poem]

Where do the unremembered scenes of a dream go?
What happens to a train of thought when you forget it?

They go to True Nothingness. Not fake nothingness,
because that's still a thing. But real and complete nihility.
What's wrong? How is nonbeing any less a miracle than being?

Don't we all wish we could go to that Anti-Place sometimes?
If like a sleeping man we could effortlessly dissolve the world:
No unsatisfying past, burdensome present, or doubtful future,
Nor aching body, speedy mind or weak heart,
Not even a consciousness of outside or inside that ever was at all.













Thursday, October 17, 2013

Blind to Heaven and Earth [Poem]

Being cerebral, I am blind to Heaven and Earth.
My thoughts, as mist, obscure this world of simple magic.
My eyes see the leaves, but not their labyrinths of texture.
My ears hear the rain, but not its soothing symphonies.
To be busy hoping, to be busy fearing, to be.

But the vision of this ocean has popped open my Mind,
revealing the vastness! There's so much going on out there!
Oh my God! This world, so much color, I could drown in it!
The redness of red, the greenness of green!
Fwooommmssshhh, Fwwwwoooommmsssshh...
Wwwwwoooossshhh, Wwooooossssssshhhhhhhh...
The mantras of the Ocean and Wind hypnotize me!
Every sight, every sensation is synthesized in this special space!
Mind, Body, and Other totally brought together as one experience!

Such incredible presence! Yeah, this is what life is all about!!!
The memory of that place is as imprinted in my mind as a carved letter on a rock.
I can bring myself back to that time and place with just a thought.




Monday, October 14, 2013

Talking On A Bus [Short Story]

I scrambled onto the bus and looked at the time: 8:00. I’m going to be on here for about fifty minutes. I hate these obscenely long bus rides, so I usually bring a book with me. Always something I ordered online, because local bookstores are too mainstream to meet my tastes. But today, after rummaging through my bag for two minutes, I realized I left the book I wanted to read on my bookshelf. God dammit.

Thankfully I was able to steal a seat for myself so I could just sit down and listen to my iPod. Except it was dead. Come on! Oh well. I can still put on the earphones from the iPod to feign listening to music. That way no one will talk to me.

With no book and no music, I just let the sounds of the city – the bus driving along, the cars honking, the people walking about – blur out everything else . That way I could space out in peace. Whenever my attention is totally withdrawn into my thoughts, it’s as though the world, instead of the chatter of my mind, is what’s unreal and distracting me.

So there I was, happily playing in la-la land, when a completely obnoxious person sitting by the back of the bus started to speak. I’d seen him on the bus before, his name was George. I don’t think he tried to be loud, he just had that kind of naturally deep and booming voice. “So… how’s your day been?” I looked over out of curiosity, and saw he wasn't really talking to anyone in particular. “Good”, replied a sorta-pretty blonde-haired girl, her neck tilted down, absorbed into her cellphone. Let’s call her ‘Belle’. “Good”, replied a man wearing a suit that was so fancy he stood out like a sore thumb. Let’s call him “Dave”.  I had never seen either of them on this bus before.

I quickly turned back so he wouldn't think I was listening to him or, worse yet, feel obligated to reply. However, I could still see their reflections in the window.

Then, a return to silence. That’s the end of that, right? It would have been if George hadn't decided it was time for round two about three minutes later. “I hate it when I feel alone in a crowd full of people. Why doesn’t anyone actually talk to each other anymore?”. No one responded.

“Fine,” He continued. He sure was pretty damn set on having his way, wasn't he? “I guess I'll start the conversation. Listen, this hour of the day is a pretty solid routine for me, you know. I get up, get my coffee, and get this bus to go to work from 9-5. Usually I'm alone and I start texting or zoning out or whatever this whole time. It’s just unusual to see two strangers here.” He was talking about ‘Belle’ and ‘David’, who are now singled out from among everyone and probably felt forced to respond. “Long story short, The bus won't reach my stop until another twenty-minutes or so, so I'd appreciate if you told me why you're both here so you can satisfy my curiosity”. George went on. He was quite an orator, I’ll give him that.

‘Belle’ took her focus away from her cellphone and tried to think of something to say. Oh boy. They took the bait. He’s going to reel them into a conversation, and because they’re all really loud everyone in the bus is going to have to hear it too - rather they like it or not.

‘David’ remarked,“Well, we talked just then, didn't we? You asked how my days been, I said good. What more do you want?”

George instantly replied, “You call that talking? That's not talking, that's just filling the air with words. Talking is genuine, it's a connection, it's... communication. I tell you, there hasn't been a single real word said since we sat down here.”  Now the awkwardness everyone in the bus felt was so thick you could feel it. I looked at my watch. Thirty more minutes to go. Oh god. Hurry up.

‘Belle’ put her cellphone into her pocket, to apologize for not listening to George before. “Well, I just moved into a new apartment, and taking this bus is an easier way to get there than walking. So you’ll be seeing a lot more of me.” she said.

“So why did you move out of your old apartment?” “Well, my boyfriend broke up with me, and I wanted to get away from him”. Now, I'm hardly an empath, but I think anyone would agree that poor ‘Belle’ felt George was probing a little too deeply. To get the focus away from her she turned to David and said, “Well, what about you? What do you want to talk about?” while faking a look of genuine interest.

“My mother died yesterday”. Everyone in the bus glanced at him, awkwardly, and then returned to their own little worlds, like turtles retreating into their shells. At this point I would have loved to have done that myself, but I was too curious for my own good. The poor man was tearing up. “I haven’t spoken to her in ten years. The last words I said to her were, ‘I’ll never forgive you for as long as I live!!!’. It was for a stupid reason, too. I’m on my way to her funeral, and I'm going to have to face the fact that for the last ten years of her life she thought her son hated her.”

Everyone in the bus was trying very hard to ignore him, except ‘Belle’ and George, who were paying attention to him now more than ever, like they were his therapist or his best friends or something. Their faces were both lit up with the light of genuine concern and compassion, which considering the fact that they were all strangers, was kinda sweet - kinda. George patted
‘David’s’ shoulder.

 “Oh my God, that’s so sad” ‘Belle’ said, with a bit of a cry coming on, too. It’s obvious she wanted to say something to cheer him up, but didn't know what to say. “I'm sure she forgave you in her heart”. Psh,that was so cheesy. “You really think so?” “Oh yeah. I know”. She said it with so much certainty that he believed it, and the tears paused. “I think so, too” George added.

The bus halted. The girl stood up and gave off a sign of irritation. “I have to go. Be strong. She forgave you and you forgave her” the girl said. “Aw shoot man, I get off here too” George noticed. He gave the crying ‘David’ some tissues. “You’ll make peace with her tonight”. That was the last thing he said before walking off. As they both walked off, everyone watched them, just as intently as they were watching their cell phones or ipods just a moment before.

I noticed they were engagedly talking to each other after they left the bus. The next time these three people meet they won’t be strangers.

As she left I thought, y’know, they did a really good thing. And here all these people are, trying to
hide in their own little worlds, while there are people suffering! Imagine how touching it would be if everyone in this bus offered sympathy. I mean, doesn't everyone want to feel happiness and avoid suffering? If we all realized just that one truth we’d be inspired to put smiles on our faces and wipe away each other’s tears. That would never happen, though. Nope. People are too busy spacing out, too busy being apathetic, too busy worrying about “me, me, me”. It’s awful. People are so selfish.

And those were the thoughts I dwelt on when the bus stopped again and I left to go to work. The impressions of the scene were washed away by the primary concerns of my day like how my shift is going to be, what I’m going to do for lunch, and what I'm gonna do when I get home. I hope there are people working today that I like. I wonder if I’ll have a good day today?


Monday, October 7, 2013

Making Earth Heaven [Poem]

Who would want to be on their death bed and realize,
"I had so many days each year to change this world I despise?"
Like being given a precious jewel and then throwing it away,
You didn't steer your life to a higher goal, you just drifted astray.

Let's make real all of those dreams of youth,
Let's fully realize all of these ecstatic truths:
Compassion, Wisdom, Abundance, Peace, and Freedom,
so they can be manifest in our own personal kingdoms.
We have the will! We can pull Heaven down to Earth!
We'll strive & struggle until all are full of mirth!!!

Heaven is the far-away ideal,
Earth is the nitty-gritty real,
And we are the bridge in-between,
making dreams reality for all beings.